A big part of a wedding is spent in anticipation of the speeches, particularly for those that are making them. It can be something that causes stress and anxiety for people that are not necessarily comfortable with public speaking. It does not have to be this way, a good way to look at it is – giving a speech about someone you love is like giving them a present you know they’ll adore. It’s a celebration, not a punishment.
One of the most important aspects of writing a good wedding speech is engaging the audience in a story. Telling a story requires you to be animated and to speak naturally – the way you would speak when you are having a conversation with your friends or reading a children’s book aloud.
Structure is also important. Every story has a beginning, middle and end. Try concluding your speech in a way that refers back to your opening comment.
There is no need to turn you speech into a thank-fest , a few brief thank you’s will normally do as part of your wedding toast and if you feel like more is needed you can always send thank you notes after the wedding day or thank people in person after the speeches are over.
Being specific is central to capturing the imagination of your audience. The idea is to use specific anecdotes of your experiences together.
Less is more. It’s always better to leave the guests on a high note rather than speaking that little bit too long and sending the guests to the bar in desperation. A speech should be about 10 minutes, but a range from 8 minutes to 12 minutes is fine.
Be prepared but do not go overboard memorising the speech. It can use a lot of your concentration that should be being used on what you’re actually saying and always read your speech to someone for feedback.
You don’t have to be a confident public speaker to make a great wedding speech , in fact to some degree it can be more touching doing something that you’re not altogether comfortable with but that you have learned just for the occasion. It can be more genuine and from the heart. In fact sometimes the most confident speeches are not the best ones at weddings, they make you laugh but you don’t walk away with anything lasting.
Another great way of preparing for your speech is to check out a local Toastmasters Club and go to a couple of meetings. At a Toastmasters meeting you will have lots of positive support from experienced speakers as well as “Newbies” like yourself, wanting to be able to do great presentations for their job / Celebrants wanting to be less nervous than the bride / or like yourself wanting to prepare that perfect speech.
Enjoy the journey!
Dianne
